Reparation
Reintroduction Book III
by Duncan Brown
#17542
If you are Robert Corrigan, you may or may not be living among the grey folds of your friend Gregor ’s developing human brain.
Perhaps you are nothing more than a persistent bad dream, a bit of undigested fruit? He hears you, or thinks he does; and you hear him, or think you do.
Corrigan, Gregor saw how you manipulated reality, manipulated him, making him surrender his life as an android and embrace immaturity and imperfection as a human. And now you watch as he makes his way to what was once France – your final request – with the ragged remnants of society, a traumatised gathering of androids, apes and humans, to create a new world.
Corrigan, this immature, imperfect man, ancient as a machine but still learning as a human, is better than you . . . even if he did once preside over the subjugation of the human species, reducing them to savages. You remain enthralled by him, or by the idea you have of him, even as your envy, your bitterness and your sense of worthlessness sour everything you touch. In this morbid state of mind, what end might you imagine not only for yourself but for the new world Gregor hopes to build? What reparation do you imagine? What elaborate reality will you weave now?
Corrigan, look at what you have done; what you are about to do. Life may have been unimaginably cruel for you, but will you enter Gregor’s world one more time, interfere when nothing has been asked of you, seek to make peace with your own despair through a reckless, desperate act . . . and is that not what you have always done?
Reintroduction
I imagine my characters as beings whose minds are layers of story, a sediment of murky experiences and memories buried in silt. I draw on lived experience. Even when considering futuristic settings, I root the story in what I have encountered in my life. I want the reader to connect with my flawed characters and the environments in which they interact. The reader will hopefully empathise even with those characters who make terrible mistakes.
I have - I hope - found a way to populate my own private traumas and obsessions with characters and situations that speak to strangers in a language they recognise from their own. The gauze used to treat a wound can cause damage if left in place too long. I prefer to remove the dressing, allowing air to get at what then also becomes a visible injury.
The world today is as frightening as the one I endured as a traumatised gay adolescent. It has the same level of dread for me as the London of the 80s and 90s. Surviving the Aids epidemic and legislation that effectively recriminalized homosexuality left me with a reflexive mistrust of power structures.
As I watch the planet I so dearly love and appreciate being abused, possibly damaged beyond repair, I feel driven to provoke discussion. I have no answers, only questions. I am not seeking to proselytize or evangelize a solution but simply to tell a story that feels relevant.